I can’t even begin to describe how largely school has impacted my life.

The place where my dreams are put to the test

I’m forced to carry the heavy burden of stress

Countless nights spent crying in the corners of my room

My tears staining my textbooks with gloom

I find myself struggling to simply wake up everyday

A feeling of bitterness I can’t seem to shake away

Insecurities are like mice, gnawing at my resolve

Knowledge slips through my fingers-

Like sugar in water

it dissolves

Each lesson I’ve learned, and each fact that I’ve discerned

But at what cost? At what toll?

Why should I be made to feel like a failure

For getting a B on a test?

My grade dropped from 103 to 100, and along with it dropped my stomach

Why do I get anxious about every little thing? 

I can’t get through a single day without panicking

It’s hurtful- and it’s damaging

Success seems like a distant thing

A quiet hum, a distant ring

My insecurities are reflected in every word I speak

Madness creeping at the edge of reason, it seems

Does my voice sound okay?

I think it sounds annoying.

Does my hair look okay? 

It was disgusting this morning. 

And it doesn’t just stop there, oh no

It’s reflected in the things I care about most

the places I call home

I drag my feet to practice, heavy weights in my soul

This sport has become another burden, yet it used to console

Disappointment etched into every move I make

The fear of failure, I just can’t seem to shake

I reach for success, but I’m met with betrayal 

I feel for happiness, but I’m still unable

I take my pain, and shove it way down

I won’t speak about it, I’d rather drown

“Get help” they say, “go to therapy”

That may num the pain, but only temporarily

I’m a soldier, marching to the beat of trepidation

With no one to turn to, with no one to hear my desperation 

Anxiety grips me in its unyielding hold

Panic sets in as expectations unfold

Hopelessness haunts me around every corner

School stress is a circus, and I’m the performer